What do dumpers think

It is a sincere request to everyone reading this, to focus on showering yourselves with self-love and healing. Well, now coming straight to the stages you need to know to understand how a dumper feels when the dumpee moves on from the beginning.

So, by now you know how a dumper feels as they find their ex-partner moving on in their lives. However, whatever the situation may be or how tragic the breakup was in the past, we can always forgive and help each other heal from the past.

Recovering from a tragic breakup is tough. It will be not easy to navigate your way out of a breakup so easily. It takes time, effort, emotions and so much more when someone just walked out of your life, leaving you heartbroken.

Though breakups are real lessons that teach us much-needed wisdom to move forward in life, we first have to learn to deal with the situation.

Reconnection from a dumper who made an unconscious breakup decision is common. Regret and nostalgia often hit hard to dumpers who see their ex-partners or dumpee move on with newfound confidence, love, and radiance.

If you are someone facing the same scenario in your life, let me make it clear and loud. It Is not always wise to get back in a relationship with your ex-partner again. There is a high chance that your ex-partner is acting from a place of nostalgia and regret in some cases.

So, before your heart melts for the sweet quotes from your dumper, wait and make a wise decision. Here is how you can tackle the situation maturely. How a dumper will behave or feel after the dumpee moves on is again a very personal choice and varies from person to person. However, the scenario witnessed in most of the cases by relationship experts and coaches is described precisely in this writeup.

I was devastated once again, on one hand i know that on this occassion i went to another extreme — since the love was mutual, i over gave because of my neediness, i kind of stopped living MY life, but instead focused on OUR life, whereas he lived HIS one and also the OUR together one….

Although I dont know if this has anything to do with the breakup itself, he didnt say why he broke up, and i preferred not to ask, because ultimately, regardless of the reason — he wanted to break up, and i do not want to have to convince someone to stay with me.

So I am once again embarking on a self development journey to become an even brighter , better version of myself than either of them ever met. To be my own love before anyone else. And next time around to not lose myself when i am with someone, to stay faithful to me first, and secondly to the man.

He must have someone else right? Please log in again. The login page will open in a new tab. After logging in you can close it and return to this page. What psychological effect does this have on them?

Why do we even want to know? But is this the real reason we went No Contact in the first place? Going No Contact with an Ex may very well push their buttons. I regret all of it Zan and i asked apologies to her aunt, her friends and even her parents already because even if i dont owe that to them i still feel i need to because i disrespected my ex. Though she had given me enough chances to make myself better and to learn to respect her, i failed to do so.

But the last time i begged for my last chance i told her i was very eager to show her i can do so much better for myself and for her. She was already talking to someone else that time but she blocked her when she gave me the last chance.

After almost 2wks we had a petty fight again. I went to their house and talked and begged her. When i went home she told me she really wanted to rest. My fault is that i was very impulsive and needy and it made her so annoyed. The person i love so much and has all the patience in the world has ran out of patience on me. She got tired and i appealed to her that im not a magician. I cant changed everything in a snap of a finger, and that i only ask for her patience for me to slowly show her i can really change because i am already changing tbh for the better but she knocked me off.

I did that to restrain myself in sending her loads of messages because i also want my brain to rest from all the emotions flying all over. And i was so immature because prior to leaving home for like 3days i sent her suicidal thoughts which made her so worried she messaged my brother and my friends about my whereabouts. For 3days she always asked my brother any news about me. And after 3days i messaged her and explained why i did that but she just ignored me.

After a day i went to their house again and talk to her and hand her a letter and a gift which was supposed to be on our monthsary. That it was too late for me to change. I ask my friends to beg her but she did not gave in. It was all accidental since she deleted all my friends on her list including me and my brother. It was a different girl this time not the one she blocked.

I was really shattered and rushed my way going to their house again. I showed her the screenshot and asked why she did this to me. After all the bad things she did also in our relationship i never left her. I never abandoned her. I dont know i dont care anymore. I feel so disrespected and after all the good things i have done, all the efforts i made, making her my most priority she doesnt have any gratitude at all. She only see all the negatives in me and in the relationship. She told me she has no plan of being with a relationship with the girl but im not stupid.

Shit right? I begged and cried for almost 4hrs but she was really not into me anymore. She doesnt need me and she dumped me for good. Both of us cried so much that night. I still ran after her for the following 4 days because i was really desperate and felt my position in her life is in danger because of the other person, but after i read your article it gave me so much enlightenment to why it happened and why she turned out to be that cold careless person now.

I wish i read your article ahead of time i could have saved face. I still think of the possibility of her coming back because i was so sure we had a good times together no matter what negatives spiraled our relationship. She also saw my good side. Im thinking maybe she just really need enough space because for 3yrs this is the 1st and the longest time i did not messaged her for all our break-up make-up since im always the one chasing her.

Im in no contact for about a week already. I blocked her for the sake of my emotional and mental state. I am so eager making myself better. I did wrote all my toxic traits here in my notes for me to slowly eliminate them.

I do some workout here at home too and keep on reading your articles most of the day to feed my brain positive outlooks.

I am also planning going home in the province to unwine and be with my highschool friends and bestfriends. As of now I am still struggling Zan.

I feel bad because i was the one who pushed her on the edge to pull the trigger. I am more concerned if she can forgive me for being so disrespectful. Im so eager to show her i can live without her. Im sorry for a very long message. Im so confused right now. And as far as i knew my ex, she is not the type of person who would really has time in this 5 stages of dumper for realization because she is so stubborn kind of person. Thankyou so much and God bless. I messaged other women.

She found out and it hurt her, I take that on the chin, it was my fault. She asked me to move out, with the idea that we stay together and go slower for a bit, during this period she would be hot in person but cold via message and calls ignoring my calls when I rang and not messaging back, but when I would get home she would be normal, cuddly and really good sex life.

It was a normal couple conversation. I then rang her on my way to work, again normal, love your at the end etc. She was then really cold again. So I called her on it. She rang me at work and said that she thaught that she just needed a few days not to talk to me. Will she unblock me? Was it impulse?

This week marks one year since She ended our engagement. I committed all the mistakes for the first few months begging, pleading, letters. She ended up leaving our church and all our friends. We were very involved together as it was our community.

We have been in no contact since February. And this week she showed up at a church function for the First time since leaving church in January.

She has been telling people that she is miserable. She also showed up at the bible study that I attend she had to know that Id be there. I have avoided conversation with her. He will be the one who loses out, not me!

Try having No Contact first. Have you dumped someone before? Did you go through these stages? Please share your experience in the comments! Your email address will not be published. HerNorm is a community-supported website. We may earn a small commission on purchases made through our links. Learn more. Anger 1. Worry 1. Anxiety 1. Relief 1. Sympathy 1. Nostalgia 1. Confusion 1.

Doubt 1. Do Breakups Hurt The Dumper? Will A Dumper Come Back? Related Content. Here's The Truth. Michele Kelsey. After decades of experience dating, I finally found my prince. It was not an easy road. I kissed plenty of frogs to find Mr. Right and learned a lot from my mistakes. I enjoy writing and feel especially lucky that I get to share my expertise on my favorite subject — love.